[VIA]
Showing posts with label assholes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label assholes. Show all posts
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
The Market (Or: And You Thought God Was a Prick)
A clear, concise expression of everything that's fucked up in modern economic theory:
[VIA]
After the 8.9-magnitude earthquake in Japan failed to induce a market nosedive, CNBC’s Larry Kudlow expressed his relief in terms that seemed to appall even his fellow cheerleaders for capitalism: “The human toll here,” he declared, “looks to be much worse than the economic toll and we can be grateful for that.”Yeah, whatever...
[VIA]
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Remember Pearl Harbor?
Yeah, I do. It was a pretty shitty movie.
But seriously... No, fucking seriously...
No, (really) seriously, on a more serious note: I haven't seen any Japanese crying on Oprah yet.
Doubleplusgoodserious: I don't imagine (Japanese) family members of quake/tsunami victims will be turning recent events into an opportunity for financial gain/fame/general cry-like -a-fucking-baby-you-poor-little-victim assholedom.
On a related but still ever-so-seriously serious note that serious people will take seriously:
Maximus Serious Assholius: A poem!!
Yeah.
But seriously... No, fucking seriously...
No, (really) seriously, on a more serious note: I haven't seen any Japanese crying on Oprah yet.
Doubleplusgoodserious: I don't imagine (Japanese) family members of quake/tsunami victims will be turning recent events into an opportunity for financial gain/fame/general cry-like -a-fucking-baby-you-poor-little-victim assholedom.
On a related but still ever-so-seriously serious note that serious people will take seriously:
Maximus Serious Assholius: A poem!!
Yeah.
Friday, April 09, 2010
Judge Not...
Events in West Virginia have triggered the latest bit of nonsense from Fred Phelps. I wonder what kind of funeral he'll have when he finally kicks it?
Friday, March 05, 2010
More Common Than You Might Think
Assholum Canadianum:
Canada's immigration minister says he takes "full responsibility" for a citizenship study guide that had all references to gay rights removed.The Canadian conservative: an asshole by any other name, eh?
[...]
Records obtained by The Canadian Press show that an early draft of the guide, meant to prepare immigrants for citizenship tests starting March 15, contained sections citing milestones in gay rights, including decriminalization of homosexuality in 1969 and the same-sex marriage law of 2005.
But Kenney's office ordered those sections removed from the draft, and rebuffed an effort by bureaucrats to have them re-inserted last August. The new guide was released with fanfare in November.
Tuesday, March 02, 2010
Who Said It?
To the first reader who identifies (in comments) the speaker of the quote below, I will write a post on the topic of his/her choice. Seriously, any topic.
[They won't always be this easy!]
God is even angrier with [Chile] than he is with the people of Haiti.So, dear readers, who said it?
If I had to guess, I’d say it must have to do with Chile’s persecution and attempted prosecution of their great former leader, and a personal hero of mine, Augusto Pinochet...
[They won't always be this easy!]
Sunday, February 21, 2010
I guess someone told him breast implants wouldn't be covered...
From purveyor of crappy tunes and recent Fox News political strategist, Kid Rock, comes probably the stupidest thing ever uttered by a human being in the entire history of anything:
Right. So Kid Rock, who's probably a millionaire, has nightmares about people driving expensive Japanese cars, living in what are essentially expensive apartments, and not having to pay for health care. A regular American dystopia. I suppose there is a certain romanticism in those bygone days when people lived in plague-infested shit holes and had to walk 50 miles so the local witch doctor could look at their festering sores and cast spells to get rid of whatever demons might be causing today's shits and coughs...
Speaking of shits and coughs, I'm strangely reminded of an MTV tribute to Aerosmith I once saw on TV. Kid Rock was there, and he did a really shitty version of some Aerosmith tune the name of which I forget. It sucked so bad, in fact, that Pink's version of a different Aerosmith tune sounded positively metal by comparison. In the end, of course, Aerosmith (an actual rock band) came out and played The Yardbirds' "The train Kept-A-Rollin'" and I completely forgot about Kid Rock until tonight.
[Kid Rock, right]
Anyway, if I could afford a Prius, I'd probably get one. I live in a condo, and consider myself pretty lucky, especially when I think about some of the other places I've spent the night. I've had health insurance almost since the time I was born (and in two different countries). It was/is national health insurance. I work. I prefer this to making a shitload of money from crappy music and then trying to convince other people that there's something wrong with looking after their own interests (oh, wait...).
Kid Rock is an asshole.
“I have nightmares sometimes you know. I’m gonna wake up and everyone’s gonna be driving Priuses…living in a condo…we’re all getting health insurance,” musician Kid Rock lamented during an interview with Fox News.[Damn, just as I was about to vent some bile, I had to put my daughter to bed--she's up late tonight because Mommy is out and Dad's... well, Dad is just being Dad. There ain't no school tomorrow! Where was I?]
Right. So Kid Rock, who's probably a millionaire, has nightmares about people driving expensive Japanese cars, living in what are essentially expensive apartments, and not having to pay for health care. A regular American dystopia. I suppose there is a certain romanticism in those bygone days when people lived in plague-infested shit holes and had to walk 50 miles so the local witch doctor could look at their festering sores and cast spells to get rid of whatever demons might be causing today's shits and coughs...
Speaking of shits and coughs, I'm strangely reminded of an MTV tribute to Aerosmith I once saw on TV. Kid Rock was there, and he did a really shitty version of some Aerosmith tune the name of which I forget. It sucked so bad, in fact, that Pink's version of a different Aerosmith tune sounded positively metal by comparison. In the end, of course, Aerosmith (an actual rock band) came out and played The Yardbirds' "The train Kept-A-Rollin'" and I completely forgot about Kid Rock until tonight.
Anyway, if I could afford a Prius, I'd probably get one. I live in a condo, and consider myself pretty lucky, especially when I think about some of the other places I've spent the night. I've had health insurance almost since the time I was born (and in two different countries). It was/is national health insurance. I work. I prefer this to making a shitload of money from crappy music and then trying to convince other people that there's something wrong with looking after their own interests (oh, wait...).
Kid Rock is an asshole.
Friday, January 15, 2010
Pat Robertson, Asshole
I guess by now anyone who cares has seen or heard about holy-roller Pat Robertson's comments suggesting that problems in Haiti are a result of a pact the Haitian people made with the devil to get out from under the French.
Leave it to a god-bothering racist piece of shit like Robertson to attribute an important moment in history to Satan. In case anyone is unaware of it, the Haitian Revolution is considered to be the first and only successful slave revolt in the New World, and it resulted in Haiti being the first republic ruled by people of African ancestry.
Pact with the devil, indeed.
We may never hear Pat Robertson (and others like him) say the word "nigger" out loud. But we don't really have to, do we?
Leave it to a god-bothering racist piece of shit like Robertson to attribute an important moment in history to Satan. In case anyone is unaware of it, the Haitian Revolution is considered to be the first and only successful slave revolt in the New World, and it resulted in Haiti being the first republic ruled by people of African ancestry.
Pact with the devil, indeed.
We may never hear Pat Robertson (and others like him) say the word "nigger" out loud. But we don't really have to, do we?
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Are We Not Men?
Just got back from a family road trip up to Yamaguchi Prefecture. I'll have some words and pictures about that later this week, but now that my wife and daughter are sleeping, and I'm showered and drinking beer, I'd like to relate a rather disturbing and disgusting spectacle I witnessed earlier today.
On our way back to Miyazaki we decided to swing by the Costco in Fukuoka to pick up some stuff (now that we're members, and all). It's the "Silver Week" holidays, so I wasn't surprised that Costco (like anyplace else in Japan on a holiday) was wall-to-wall crowded.
Anyway, we wend our way through the aisles picking up items that my wife deems necessary (and value-priced!) to our household. (A penchant for 5-gallon jugs of whiskey and 48-packs of beer has resulted, over the years, in the loss of my "can-deem-something-necessary" powers in our household's political hierarchy. There was also the Amazon CD and book fiasco...) We've got some coffee in our cart, some clothes for our daughter, a case of soup (a subtle victory of mine!), and some other stuff. Not much really.
We wait until we have everything else until we go to the fresh food section of the store (bakery, meat, produce, etc.--stuff we might have to put in a cooler before driving home). This is only my second time at this store, but I think this particular section is generally very crowded, so many people park their carts on the fringes and go in "hands free." My wife wanted to buy some rolls, but the shelf was empty. She seemed sure that they would be putting some more out soon, so she told us (our daughter and me) to go wait by the cart for a few minutes until she was finished. When we left her she was the only person in line waiting for rolls...
After about 15 minutes our daughter started getting a bit antsy, so I decided to go see what was keeping my wife. As I approached the spot where I'd left her a few minutes earlier, I could see a crowd had formed. I could also see that staff behind the bakery counter were basically just throwing bags of rolls over the counter and on to the sloped shelf one by one as they were being prepared, so that they basically slid down into the hands of whomever was lucky enough to be standing in that particular spot. To say there was a "scramble" for these rolls would be a slight understatement. My wife, who's not a very tall woman, and who was still right at the front of the counter where I had left her, was not having much luck. In fact, much taller men were reaching over her and plucking bags of rolls before she could reach them...
Freeze that scene for a moment. I've seen similar scenes with my wife before. These scenes are, simultaneously, a source of pride and frustration for me. I've never seen her jostle for position, when any rule of fairness would say that she has it. I've never seen her scramble or clutch at or fight for anything that she had every right to have in her hands. I honestly don't know if she has some kind of inner zen, or if she's simply "too good" to lower herself to that level; perhaps if it's some combination. I do know that after about a minute--in fact, it's probably exactly one minute-- of that kind of crap, I'm gonna get nasty...
If it had just been women fighting it out for these fucking rolls I probably would have let things run their course. (Hey, I've read The Bacchae!) If that sounds a bit (or very) sexist, well, excuse my sorry ass. I assume that the only reason any woman would find herself fighting tooth and nail over food is to feed her kids. The beer and potato chips are elsewhere... And, as I've already mentioned, some sorry-assed pricks calling themselves men had already interjected themselves into the situation.
I'm still holding back a bit until one bag of rolls comes cleanly into my wife's hands. I say "cleanly" in the sense that she's started to turn around and walk away with her prize. Just then, some asshole, some prick, some fucking piece of shit who no doubt considers himself a hero of modern manhood, some worthless scumbag, grabbed the bag from my wife's hands. She had a good grip on it, so when he grabbed it away the bag actually ripped a bit. And then, and then, he held the bag of rolls up like a prize and actually cried out in triumph.
At that moment I wished for nothing more than a machete so that I could remove that asshole's head and hold it up like a trophy with a shout of triumph. Fortunately (or not, who really knows?), I've been hanging out with my wife too long for anything like that to happen. Instead, I (firmly but gently--ahem) made my way through the crowd, put my hand on my wife's shoulder, and told her not to worry about it, let's get out of here.
The next bag of rolls fell into her hand. No one else touched it.
On our way back to Miyazaki we decided to swing by the Costco in Fukuoka to pick up some stuff (now that we're members, and all). It's the "Silver Week" holidays, so I wasn't surprised that Costco (like anyplace else in Japan on a holiday) was wall-to-wall crowded.
Anyway, we wend our way through the aisles picking up items that my wife deems necessary (and value-priced!) to our household. (A penchant for 5-gallon jugs of whiskey and 48-packs of beer has resulted, over the years, in the loss of my "can-deem-something-necessary" powers in our household's political hierarchy. There was also the Amazon CD and book fiasco...) We've got some coffee in our cart, some clothes for our daughter, a case of soup (a subtle victory of mine!), and some other stuff. Not much really.
We wait until we have everything else until we go to the fresh food section of the store (bakery, meat, produce, etc.--stuff we might have to put in a cooler before driving home). This is only my second time at this store, but I think this particular section is generally very crowded, so many people park their carts on the fringes and go in "hands free." My wife wanted to buy some rolls, but the shelf was empty. She seemed sure that they would be putting some more out soon, so she told us (our daughter and me) to go wait by the cart for a few minutes until she was finished. When we left her she was the only person in line waiting for rolls...
After about 15 minutes our daughter started getting a bit antsy, so I decided to go see what was keeping my wife. As I approached the spot where I'd left her a few minutes earlier, I could see a crowd had formed. I could also see that staff behind the bakery counter were basically just throwing bags of rolls over the counter and on to the sloped shelf one by one as they were being prepared, so that they basically slid down into the hands of whomever was lucky enough to be standing in that particular spot. To say there was a "scramble" for these rolls would be a slight understatement. My wife, who's not a very tall woman, and who was still right at the front of the counter where I had left her, was not having much luck. In fact, much taller men were reaching over her and plucking bags of rolls before she could reach them...
Freeze that scene for a moment. I've seen similar scenes with my wife before. These scenes are, simultaneously, a source of pride and frustration for me. I've never seen her jostle for position, when any rule of fairness would say that she has it. I've never seen her scramble or clutch at or fight for anything that she had every right to have in her hands. I honestly don't know if she has some kind of inner zen, or if she's simply "too good" to lower herself to that level; perhaps if it's some combination. I do know that after about a minute--in fact, it's probably exactly one minute-- of that kind of crap, I'm gonna get nasty...
If it had just been women fighting it out for these fucking rolls I probably would have let things run their course. (Hey, I've read The Bacchae!) If that sounds a bit (or very) sexist, well, excuse my sorry ass. I assume that the only reason any woman would find herself fighting tooth and nail over food is to feed her kids. The beer and potato chips are elsewhere... And, as I've already mentioned, some sorry-assed pricks calling themselves men had already interjected themselves into the situation.
I'm still holding back a bit until one bag of rolls comes cleanly into my wife's hands. I say "cleanly" in the sense that she's started to turn around and walk away with her prize. Just then, some asshole, some prick, some fucking piece of shit who no doubt considers himself a hero of modern manhood, some worthless scumbag, grabbed the bag from my wife's hands. She had a good grip on it, so when he grabbed it away the bag actually ripped a bit. And then, and then, he held the bag of rolls up like a prize and actually cried out in triumph.
At that moment I wished for nothing more than a machete so that I could remove that asshole's head and hold it up like a trophy with a shout of triumph. Fortunately (or not, who really knows?), I've been hanging out with my wife too long for anything like that to happen. Instead, I (firmly but gently--ahem) made my way through the crowd, put my hand on my wife's shoulder, and told her not to worry about it, let's get out of here.
The next bag of rolls fell into her hand. No one else touched it.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Go to Hell, Please
I'm trying to wrap my mind around this: A New York Times reporter writes that Donald Trump's "true worth lies in the millions of dollars, rather than in the billions as the mogul maintains."
In retaliation, Trump sues the reporter for 5 billion dollars. What a dick.
[Via FARK]
In retaliation, Trump sues the reporter for 5 billion dollars. What a dick.
[Via FARK]
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Whatever
Would I be a bad person if I said that world economic collapse meant nothing to me?
World economic collapse means nothing to me.
Destroy All Monsters-Bored
I'm serious.
World economic collapse means nothing to me.
I'm serious.
Saturday, September 20, 2008
The Triumph of the Communists
Free markets, capitalism, responsibility, my fucking ass. George W. Bush is a fucking commie! Commie, commie, commie! Everyone, and I mean everyone who benefits from this is a fucking commie! Commie, commie, commie! Commie traitors!
Ahh, fuck it...
Ahh, fuck it...
Friday, September 05, 2008
Thursday, March 20, 2008
The Scoop
Every doubt I've ever had about American mainstream media has been confirmed. This is an actual headline from an actual American TV network's website:
Way to fucking go, guys. Wow. You really got to the bottom of things this time, didn't you?
Fucking assholes.
Hillary At White House on 'Stained Blue Dress' Day
Way to fucking go, guys. Wow. You really got to the bottom of things this time, didn't you?
Fucking assholes.
Friday, January 25, 2008
Meta-Stupid
Ever the ground-breaking asshole, Fred "God hates fags" Phelps plans to picket the funeral of Heath Ledger for the "sin" of portraying a gay man in Brokeback Mountain. I'm struggling, trying to wrap my mind around this. Stupidity based on stupidity based on stupidity... Fuck off, assholes.
Ian Dury-Sex and Drugs and Rock'n'Roll
Thursday, January 17, 2008
No Dessert...
... for this unfortunate woman in Japan who, homeless and starving, was too weak to open the food given to her by government officials, and died outside Hamamatsu city hall.
Friday, December 28, 2007
Bloody Fucking Hell
Of all the stupid, I mean really fucking stupid things, this has got to be the saddest, stupidest thing. Bloody fucking hell. Fuck.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Monday, August 20, 2007
True Canadian Facts! (2)
Our wingnut friends in the south are veritable fonts of information and trivia about Canada. They certainly know us better than we know ourselves and we really appreciate their unceasing efforts to educate us and keep us in our place.
--Canada sent troops to Vietnam. (Ann Coulter)
--Canada exists solely through the good graces of its American benefactors. (Ann Coulter)
--Canadians are mentally-retarded stalkers who obsess about the United States. Anybody with any ambition at all in Canada has left and now lives in New York. (Tucker Carlson)
--"Without the U.S., Canada is essentially Honduras, but colder and much less interesting." "... the average Canadian is busy dogsledding." (Tucker Carlson)
--[...] Canadians... are often among the nicest and most decent people you'd ever want to meet. They just don't live in a normal country. (Jonah Goldberg)
--Canada is a haven for terrorists. "[...] virtually every terrorist organization in the world has come to and set up shop at one time or another in Canada..." (Pat Buchanan)
--"[...] Canada is a homo-fascist state where the filthy fag agenda has become the law of the land." "God hates Canada!" (Fred Phelps)
As a Canadian it pleases me that these (and many other) luminaries of the arts and sciences in America have devoted their time and energy to the study of Canada and all things Canadian, and have, by their selfless and untiring efforts, contributed to the world's knowledge and understanding of Canada. Bless you all, and please, keep up the good work!
--Canada sent troops to Vietnam. (Ann Coulter)
--Canada exists solely through the good graces of its American benefactors. (Ann Coulter)
--Canadians are mentally-retarded stalkers who obsess about the United States. Anybody with any ambition at all in Canada has left and now lives in New York. (Tucker Carlson)
--"Without the U.S., Canada is essentially Honduras, but colder and much less interesting." "... the average Canadian is busy dogsledding." (Tucker Carlson)
--[...] Canadians... are often among the nicest and most decent people you'd ever want to meet. They just don't live in a normal country. (Jonah Goldberg)
--Canada is a haven for terrorists. "[...] virtually every terrorist organization in the world has come to and set up shop at one time or another in Canada..." (Pat Buchanan)
--"[...] Canada is a homo-fascist state where the filthy fag agenda has become the law of the land." "God hates Canada!" (Fred Phelps)
As a Canadian it pleases me that these (and many other) luminaries of the arts and sciences in America have devoted their time and energy to the study of Canada and all things Canadian, and have, by their selfless and untiring efforts, contributed to the world's knowledge and understanding of Canada. Bless you all, and please, keep up the good work!
Sunday, August 12, 2007
From the Really Fucking Stupid Dept.
From This AP story we learn of a discrimination suit being brought against federal officials and JetBlue Airways in the US. Apparently in August of 2006, Raed Jarrar, an Iraqi architect who's been a US resident since 2005, and who's married to an American citizen, was barred from boarding his flight "because he wore a T-shirt inscribed with an Arabic phrase."
"We will not be silent" in Arabic and English... Pretty radical stuff. I guess Mr. Jarrar should have had a more "American" slogan on his tee, maybe something like "Live free or die" (although Mr. Jarrar, being an Iraqi, could be forgiven if he found such a slogan too poignantly ironic).
I wish I had been there. I would gladly have loaned him this t-shirt of mine:
The incident is part of a discriminatory pattern at airports since the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks, with officials targeting people perceived to be of Arab descent — particularly those displaying their ethnic background or religious faith, two civil liberties groups said Thursday in filing the lawsuit.
The ACLU, joined by the New York Civil Liberties Union, filed the federal lawsuit on behalf of Raed Jarrar. The Iraqi architect was barred from the JetBlue flight for wearing a shirt that read, in English and Arabic, "We Will Not Be Silent."
[...]
Last August, a Transportation Security Administration official identified only as Inspector Harris pulled Jarrar away from a boarding gate, took him to a JetBlue counter and told him his shirt made other passengers uncomfortable, the complaint said.
Jarrar was told to cover up the message if he wanted to board the flight to his home in Oakland, Calif. The TSA official equated wearing Jarrar's an [sic] Arabic shirt to an airport with "wearing a T-shirt at a bank stating, 'I am a robber,'" the complaint said.
[...]
Jarrar, who now lives in Washington, D.C., said he was intimidated into wearing a shirt purchased by a JetBlue customer service agent over his T-shirt. His seat was also moved to the back of the plane and he was forced to board first, said the lawsuit, which seeks unspecified damages.
"We will not be silent" in Arabic and English... Pretty radical stuff. I guess Mr. Jarrar should have had a more "American" slogan on his tee, maybe something like "Live free or die" (although Mr. Jarrar, being an Iraqi, could be forgiven if he found such a slogan too poignantly ironic).
I wish I had been there. I would gladly have loaned him this t-shirt of mine:
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