Hell Hath No Fury...

I had a date like this once...



Ouch!!

No Comment...

I believe the following items speak for themselves...

From John Rogers at Kung Fu Monkey:

Ironically, any halfway decent screenwriter/director pair could have made that mini-series [The Path to 9/11] and made Clinton look like an ass without inventing anything at all -- but that would have required a talent for subtlety evident in a level of professionalism that would make writing propoganda ... distasteful.

From, ahem, Hermann Goering [G.M. Gilbert: Nuremberg Diary, 1947; pp. 278-279]

Why, of course, the people don't want war. Why would some poor slob on a farm want to risk his life in a war when the best that he can get out of it is to come back to his farm in one piece. Naturally, the common people don't want war; neither in Russia nor in England nor in America, nor for that matter in Germany. That is understood. But, after all, it is the leaders of the country who determine the policy and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy or a fascist dictatorship or a Parliament or a Communist dictatorship.
[...] Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country.

From Keith Olbermann (via Poor Man):

'Car Queen'

This car shop sign caught my eye as I was driving by it the other day. I can't decide if there's something odd about naming your shop 'Car Queen', or if there's something odd about me for thinking it's odd. I don't think I'd want to buy a car, or get my car fixed, at a place called Car Queen. Gentle readers, do you think I'm a little sexist, or even homophobic for feeling this way?
And some of the cars they had? Well, I can't imagine your typical hetero-guy --and indeed, if you ask anyone, "Hey, what's that Kyklops guy like?", they'll tell you staight out, "Oh, you know, he's a typical hetero-guy...")... Anyway, I can't imagine your typical hetero-guy wanting to get behind the wheel of some of the cars they had for sale at this place. I mean, really, a Honda 'Life Dunk'? Isuzu's 'Mysterious Utility'? Mitsubishi's 'Delica Space Gear'? And the list goes on: from Toyota there's the 'Nadia' and the 'Gaia', and Mazda has the 'Bongo Friendee' (I hope I never see the day when I say to my friends, "Hey, let's hop in my Bongo Friendee and go downtown to watch the girls!" [shivers]).
[Note: Readers from outside Japan can verify that I'm not inventing these car names here and here. Readers in Japan know the horror all too well...]

It's a Boy...

Princess Kiko, the wife of Prince Akishino, the Emperor's second son, gave birth to a boy Wednesday morning, a long-awaited male heir to the Chrysanthemum Throne.
The baby, delivered by Cesarean section, is the first male born to the Imperial family in 41 years and becomes the third in line to the throne after Crown Prince Naruhito, 46, and Prince Akishino, 40.
The birth will put off the succession crisis facing the Imperial family for a while.

I wasn't going to write about this story at all because, frankly, I find the notions of 'royalty', 'aristocracy', 'divine right', 'imperial succession', etc. both morally repugnant and logically absurd. Any particular monarch might not necessarily be a bad person, but we can be pretty certain, if we go back far enough in the family line, his/her ancestors would most likely be considered homicidal maniacs in modern society. Why anyone should be proud that his/her ancestors did more killing, raping, and stealing than mine or yours is a bit beyond my understanding... Anyway, having got that out of the way, this story is not completely without interest.

Conservative elements in Japan are no doubt relieved that Princess Kiko had a boy. The current system of succession does not allow women to inherit the throne but, until yesterday, it had been 41 years since a male was born into the royal family. Last year a panel convened by Prime Minister Koizumi recommended that the laws be changed to allow women and their children to ascend to the throne. News of Princess Kiko's pregnancy put off the introduction of a bill to parliament. Conservatives argue that male-only succession, to ensure the 'purity of the male bloodline' (ie.the Y chromosome), is the throne's defining characteristic. In order to prevent a woman from becoming monarch, conservatives proposed bringing back other branches of the imperial family (which were abolished after World War II), and even went so far as suggesting a revival of the concubine system.

Most Japanese, while happy that the new baby is healthy, remain divided over whether to revise the Imperial House Law to allow females to take the Chrysanthemum Throne. Many people appear to be concerned about the effects recent events might have on Princess Masako, wife of the current royal heir, Prince Naruhito. By all accounts an intelligent and articulate woman, the Harvard-educated Masako gave up her career as a diplomat to marry Naruhito and join the royal family. The pressure on Masako to bear a son, however, pushed her into depression and provoked Naruhito to publicly defend his wife (almost unheard of in Japan). It was the birth of their daughter Aiko that initially prompted lawmakers, with a lot of public support, to begin looking into changing the rules of succession.

It's perhaps not surprising that the issue of royal succession is illustrative of one aspect of the conservative/progressive divide in Japan. One interesting point, though, does seem to be emerging. While conservatives are clearly happy about the birth of a male heir, Prince Akishino and Princess Kiko appear to be actively courting and winning favor with Japan's more conservative elements. Crown Prince Naruhito and Princess Masako, on the other hand, apparently have the sympathy of younger, more progressive-minded Japanese. Whether or not this leads to increased politicization of the throne, from within the royal family, it's really too early to say.

Giant Girl Doll

A little eerie, but compelling nonetheless... [via Goldtoe]

Japan and Canada...

...join hands against South Korea... This kinda jumped off the page at me. According to the article, from the Bahrain News Agency, "Japan and Canada agreed on joining efforts to help halt South Korea's nuclear and missile development programme."
[This headline will probably be fixed by the time anyone reads this post, but I swear, that's what it said...]

This Site Is 36% Evil

(Something seems to have drained what little creative energy I might previously have possessed. I can't even rouse myself to a mid-level rant about something Japanese these days. So, to pass the time, and to engage in some 'therapeutic' typing, I'll content myself with a little linkwhoring. The following via the nonist.)

From The Sect of Homokaasu, the Gematriculator:

The Gematriculator is a service that uses the infallible methods of Gematria developed by Mr. Ivan Panin to determine how good or evil a web site or a text passage is.
Basically, Gematria is searching for different patterns through the text [...]
Experts consider the mathematical patterns in the text of the Holy Bible as God's watermark of authenticity. Thus, the Gematriculator provides only results that are absolutely correct.

Use the Gematriculator to rate the 'evil-ness' of your site! Just enter a URL and, presto!, you have your results. "Wasn't that fun? Now waste your time by killing everyone!"

Graveblogging

I guess it could be argued that a site like Find A Grave probably has some utility as a reference source ("Millions of Cemetery Records and Online Memorials"), but personally I think it's more interested in pandering to a morbid fascination with celebrity. The most popular searches at the time of this writing include some unsurprising results:
Number One: JonBenet Ramsey (I refuse to link to this because, well, I like to think that I have some sense of decency. If I seem a trifle self-important, too fucking bad...)
Other 'Celebrities' in the Top 20: Ingrid Bergman (2); Hedy Lamarr (3); Lee Marvin (!) (5); Jim Morrison (15); Diana Spencer (16);
Surprisingly (to me, at least) coming in at number 6 is Saint John the Baptist.
The photo (click for larger view) is from the gravesite of my favorite poet, John Keats (this is a good place to start if you're unfamiliar with Keats' life and poetry). The inscription at the bottom of the gravestone reads, "Here lies one whose name was writ in water". This was what Keats requested shortly before his death, at the age of 25. The words above this were written after Keats' death by a friend who was bitter about how the young poet's life turned out.

This Living Hand

This living hand, now warm and capable
Of earnest grasping, would, if it were cold
And in the icy silence of the tomb,
So haunt thy days and chill thy dreaming nights
That thou wouldst wish thine own heart dry of blood
So in my veins red life might stream again,
And thou be conscience-calmed—see here it is—
I hold it towards you.

--John Keats 1819

Dork with a Camera

This is a picture of a dork with a camera, taken in the parking area outside the condo said dork lives in. Like the Delphic Oracle, Socrates, et al, I've always felt that self-awareness is the key to knowledge. I know I'm a dork, so it's ok...

Sunset

I haven't really felt like writing much the past couple of weeks, so I thought I'd post a photo. I don't post many of my own photos because I'm not much of a photographer, but once and a while I get lucky and spot something interesting like the cloud formation in this Miyazaki sunset. Not the highest quality pic because it was taken with my cell phone.

I'll be back soon...

To the few friends who regularly drop by my humble blog: I've been really busy lately and just returned from a conference in beautiful Fukuoka. Now I'm going away for a couple of days with my family to a nearby resort area in Kirishima. The time away from my pc and my blog is taking it's toll, but like Arnold says in The Terminator: "I'll be back."

These are a few of the things I like about...

... living in Miyazaki, Japan.
I like that I don't have to worry about some idiot stealing anything I don't nail to the wall or keep under 24-hour surveillance. A bicycle is safe with a simple wheel lock; my wife can go to the washroom and leave her purse on the table (which I still discourage); I have forgotten my camera somewhere and gone back to find it was still there.
I like that I don't have to pay an arm and a leg for a pack of smokes and/or a beer.
I like that, in eight years here, I have never heard one negative racial comment directed my way (well, except for being mistaken for American...heh!); my half-euro/Japanese daughter is accepted and treated like the future queen of Japan.
I like that I don't have to argue with anyone about Quebec.
I like that I don't have to argue with anyone about religion (Japan is a good place for atheists, although skeptics (like me) may have a harder time--there will be a more serious post about this in the future...).
I like (and I might as well be honest about it) that the simple fact that I'm an educated English-speaking person has allowed me to get good jobs here.
I like that I have a great wife and a beautiful daughter; I like that they have made me (I think) a better man.
Japan has been good to me...

Keystone Kops

I guess that people around the world all have different ideas about what makes a 'good cop'. Probably for most of us a good cop is one who protects the innocent and catches the bad guys. In North America people are becoming quite used to seeing examples of police brutality on TV. Stories of police corruption also seem to be more common these days. I'm not really sure how the average Japanese feels about the police here.
In the video below is the most shocking spectacle of bad police behaviour I have ever seen. North Americans in particular may not be able to believe what they are seeing. The following video is from a Japanese news broadcast and is in Japanese, so let me set it up a little (details in English here): a car has left the road and smashed into some sort of structure; rescue workers are trying to help the driver, who seems to be a bit unhinged; the driver seems to go a bit crazy and starts smashing up the inside of his car; the police arrive; the man gets out of his car and moves toward the police brandishing some sort of club... What follows will shock and astound you...



I couldn't quite believe my eyes when I first saw this...

Comment Verification

Well, I guess it had to happen sooner or later. There's been a spike in the number of spam messages in the comments section, so I've enabled the "Comment Verification" device (it's not like I get a gajillion comments anyway, but this week I got more spam than real comments...). Anyway, sorry for the inconvenience.
[And please, no "I told you so"s from the wordpress crowd, or I'll have to start moderating comments as well!]

Go and sin no more...

Whether you're religious or not, whether you have kids or not, you will probably be amused (and you may even laugh out loud) when you read Old Testament Parenting: 'Lamentations of the Father'. Some excerpts:

Laws When at Table

Eat your food only; do not eat that which is not food; neither seize the table between your jaws, nor use the raiment of the table to wipe your lips. I say again to you, do not touch it, but leave it as it is.

And though your stick of carrot does indeed resemble a marker, draw not with it upon the table, even in pretend, for we do not do that, that is why. And though the pieces of broccoli are very like small trees, do not stand them upright to make a forest, because we do not do that,that is why.

Sit just as I have told you, and do not lean to one side or the other, nor slide down until you are nearly slid away. Heed me; for if you sit like that, your hair will go into the syrup. And now behold, even as I have said, it has come to pass.

Laws Pertaining to Dessert

But of the unclean plate, the laws are these: If you have eaten most of your meat, and two bites of your peas with each bite consisting of not less than three peas each, or in total six peas, eaten where I can see, and you have also eaten enough of your potatoes to fill two forks, both forkfuls eaten where I can see, then you shall have dessert.

On Screaming

[...] if you receive a portion of fish from which every piece of herbal seasoning has not been scraped off, and the herbal seasoning is loathsome to you and steeped in vileness, again I say, refrain from screaming. Though the vileness overwhelm you, and cause you a faint unto death, make not that sound from within your throat, neither cover your face, nor press your fingers to your nose. For even I have made the fish as it should be; behold, I eat it myself, yet shall not surely die.

Various Other Laws, Statutes, and Ordinances

Bite not, lest you be also bitten again. Neither drink of your own bath water, nor of the bath water of any kind; nor rub your feet on bread, even if it be in the package; nor rub yourself against cars, not against any building; nor eat sand.

[Hat tip: God of the Machine; via: Volokh Conspiracy]

[Addendum: My daughter has been free of her father's "lamentations" these past two weeks because she's been away at her grandparents' place having the time of her life playing with her cousin (whom she has a huge crush on--she's not quite 4, he's 9 and has the patience of Job...). I realized while chuckling over this piece that I was actually laughing at myself...]

Mutually Assured Drunk Driving

Maybe it's exhaustion from grading end of term tests and papers (terms here run April-July, October-January). Maybe it's the heat. Maybe it's a 'dog days' combination of the two. I dunno. I've started several interesting, informative and insightful (heh) articles on various topics related to Japan but, for now at least, they're languishing as 'drafts'. I don't have the mental energy right now to do a proper job on them (and I'm working a deadline to finish a presentation I have to give next week). Sunday was the 61st anniversary of the atomic bombing of Hiroshima, and I had planned to write something about it. I guess it'll wait until next year... While researching said article, however, I came upon a rather amusing quote.
In an article attempting to justify American use of the atomic bomb, the writer refers to Japan's attempt to make atomic bombs during the war, and then makes the following rather comical comment:

Had we [the US] tried the invasion route, it is entirely possible that Japan might have been able to complete a bomb and use it on us. MADD would not have sufficed to prevent it because Japan had absolutely nothing to loose by using it.
[I haven't altered this quote, and if you check the link, you'll see that there's an 'editorial' note informing us that the article was originally posted to the site one year ago...]

Now, clearly Mothers Against Drunk Driving could not have prevented the Japanese from loosing their atomic bombs. But they didn't have any, so yes, "Japan had absolutely nothing to loose". (Right about now I feel like my brain is turning into a Moebius strip.) In fact, MADD, as an organization, didn't even exist that long ago (although it must be granted that an early form of MAD did).
So, clearly, Japan had everything to lose by having nothing to loose, and America was the winner because it was the looser. And that's the story of Hiroshima...

One a these days... to tha Moon!

I'm all for the exploration of space and stuff, but it seems a bit odd to me that a rapidly de-populating country like Japan is seriously planning to build a crewed lunar base by 2030. Now what could they be up to...

God of the Machine

Wow. And I mean, wow.

Smokin' Fool

Yes, I'm a smoker. I've tried many times to give up cigarettes, but I can't do it. I'm weak. I'm a slave to an evil, filthy habit. Living in Japan, it's even more difficult to quit, because Japan is, well, smoker's heaven! A pack of smokes costs just 320 yen (about 3-4 dollars, depending on where you live), and that's after a recent tax hike, which resulted in Japan Tobacco, the world's third largest cigarette company, recording a 60 percent rise in profits in the most recent quarter. Of course the government (like all governments) pays careful lip service to educating people about the dangers of smoking, but the fact is that smokes are a major money cow for governments. Heh, the Japanese government is actually the biggest shareholder in Japan Tobacco (it holds 67.77 percent of issued stock).
Anyway, the Japanese are nothing if not polite, so I've included a couple of nifty graphics from a series sponsored by Japan Tobacco on smoking etiquette. [Very odd. I originally had a link to the Japan Tobacco site here, but just after posting this it went down...]

The 'Audio-Lingual' Method: Survival English

I think the video below is meant as a parody, but it's so close to the reality of teaching English at many conversation schools here in Japan (and elsewhere) that I can't really be sure. It actually looks like a lot of 'learn English' TV shows I've seen here.
[Courtesy Harry at Chase Me, Ladies; (via Dog Bones)]



Yes, in many places that would constitute an English lesson: 'useful' expressions, 'realistic' situataions, singing, dancing...