Monday, March 19, 2007

Grappling with Google and Gay Porn

More Google oddness...

About four years ago, in the earliest days of this blog, I wrote this post about the Great Sasuke, a masked pro-wrestler here in Japan who had been elected to a local prefectural assembly (making him the first masked legislator in history), and who soon after had been accused of appearing in a porn movie (masked, of course).

One of the people quoted in this story was a Japanese porn star, "Meatball" Yoshino [Link DEFINITELY NSFW!!!]. Being a goofy kinda guy, I found this guy's nickname to be absolutely hilarious (and I'm trying not to laugh about it as I write this). Anyway, when I was writing the article I desperately wanted an image of "Meatball" Yoshino, but I couldn't find anything that wasn't pornographic, so I settled on just linking to this image [NSFW!!], which (like the previous link) is from some kind of Japanese gay porn site.

Now what's funny is that the original post is so old that I think every link in the story has gone stale, except the pornographic one. What's weird is that Google is sending people to my site [SFW as long as you don't click to enlarge!] to view the image that I linked to but didn't post in the original story. You've seen this type of page before if you've ever searched for images with Google: "Below is the image in its original context on the page..." But the image was never on my page, just a link! Weird.

The result of all this is that I've been getting a steady flow of page hits for this image that I never posted. I have no idea what the people who arrive here are using for search terms (I suspect something like "gay Sasuke" or "gay Japan", but those are only guesses).

It's at a time like this, dear readers, where I feel duty-bound to renew the pledge I made just a few short months ago:
I, Kyklops, hereby do solemnly swear to my loyal readership that I shall:
--never make gratuitous posts about "Nude Japanese Girls!!!"
--generally refrain from any mention of "Japanese Pornography!!!" (except in the context of stories dealing with "Strange Sexual Habits of the Japanese!!!")
--never write the phrase "Japanese Girls Want Your White Ass!!!"

To this I now add the following: I shall never post "Images of Big Japanese Cocks!!!".

12 comments:

  1. Too late, k. Oh, and is there such a thing as a big Japanese cock?

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  2. Glenn,
    Now why did I know that you'd be the first to comment? ;-)
    You're also the first to make the obvious joke from my obvious, er, "straight" line...

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  3. Oh man, Kyklops, the Google hits you are going to get now.

    I may be coming to your site several times today -- once through my blogroll and several times through Google.

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  4. I guess I am pretty upfront. Funny post, though. But why am I intrigued by "Japanese Girls Want Your White Ass"?

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  5. By the way, I meant that I would land here via Google because of some of the phrases in your original pledge (not the added pledge).

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  6. GT, Let the macho posturing begin! (Heh, I knew what you meant... maybe!).

    Glenn, "Japanese Girls Want Your White Ass" was the slogan of the English conversation school that originally lured me to Japan. I, of course, came only for the academic opportunities. My having a white ass was pure coincidence...

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  7. This post proves two things: 1. the world is smaller than a pinhead. Thanks to the web, coincidences ceased to exist.
    2. Never discuss gay porn with straight guys. They'll never state their true opinion! lol

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  8. How funny. I can relate, to some extent. I should NEVER have put the word "housewife" in my blog title, and having done so, should not have written anything about the columnist Randy Cohen. I'm now near the top of the Google results for "Randy Housewife."

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  9. Usual Stuff,
    1. Yes... see Emarie's comment! 2. Why, I don't know what you mean!

    Emarie,
    That's quite funny (because I just did the search and there you are!). If you get enough page hits for that term maybe you can start breaking the data down geographically and determine which area's men (or women?) are yearning for a "randy housewife".
    Come to think of it, "randy" is probably not the adjective I would use if I were inclined to search for that kind of thing (I'd probably use the more direct "naked", again, if I were the type to search for that kind of thing). Perhaps something can be inferred from this...?

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  10. Gratuitous porn baiting makes the world go round. I get about fifty percent of my traffic for searches for "anal sex" and "sexy ass". In fact I'm on the first page of google results for sexy ass. Google thinks I have one of the sexiest asses in the world. Who am I to argue?

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  11. ...some kind of Japanese gay porn site.
    Yes, or something like that, very probably.

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  12. Mr. Angry, there is no arguing with Google!

    Pierre, umm...er...well...

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